Answers to Frequently Asked Questions About

Cultivate Your Calling

 

What is a calling or life mission?

Richard Bolles details three parts to understanding and growing in your mission in life, the first two of which are shared with the rest of the human race, while the third is uniquely yours:

1.      “. . . to seek to stand hour by hour in the conscious presence of God, the One from whom your Mission is derived.”

2.      “ . . . to do what you can, moment by moment, day by day, step by step, to make this world a better place, following the leading and guidance of God’s Spirit within you and around you.”

3.      a) to exercise that Talent which you particularly came to Earth to use—your greatest gift, which you most delight to use,

b) in the place(s) or setting(s) which God has caused to appeal to you the most,

c) and for those purposes which God most needs to have done in the world.

 

                              (Richard Bolles, What Color Is Your Parachute, 2005)

 

This website primarily deals with the third type of calling cited here, but also addresses Cultivating Your Character to match your calling which addresses the first and second points.

 

How can I possibly figure out my child’s calling when he is still young?

            You can’t. But you certainly can see clues. Remember, the most important thing is to train your child how to watch for and interpret those clues, to be inquisitive and intentional in their development toward their calling, and how to find out whatever they need to know in any given situation.

 

Where should I begin?

            Begin with an area of high interest such as a hobby, sport, pastime, recreational activity, etc. Show your child how to find information about his chosen topic and how to brainstorm what he would like to find out about it. Also find at least one or more people who also like the same subject area to talk to or interview for further direction and leads on great resources.

                                                                                    

How much of an initial time investment will this require for parents?

            Initially, parents need to have a good understanding of the Cultivate Your Calling process and brush up on any necessary research skills. Then they should plan the first couple of growth plans for their child and allow some time to design subsequent plans with their child until the child is ready to take responsibility to equip himself for his own calling.

 

How young can my child start?

            As soon as you see strong preferences or inclinations of interest or abilities, you should model how to find more information and/or experience to intentionally develop that emerging curiosity. As parents, we do this naturally when we buy gifts for our children based on what we know they enjoy. Just take it up a notch and make it somewhat educational and purposeful. Even if it happens to be a passing interest, your child learns the critical process of intentional development and self-study skills essential for lifelong learning in any field of interest.

 

How soon can my child design his own personal growth plans?

            Children must see any new process modeled several times before they understand it. Ideally, once your child is Junior High age or older, plan the first growth plan for your child, then plan at least 2-3 together, then let them have a try on their own (you provide only the structure and criteria) and they come to you for input or revision. I have had great success with Jr. High and older students I teach at a homeschool Co-Op, who demonstrated a great deal of motivation when given ownership of their own learning (within a structured format) and completely took charge of their growth plans. You will be amazed at how they take off!

 

How can I begin to train my child to be a self-directed learner?

            Most importantly, model your own love of learning in a high interest area you have. Even better, try to find a shared interest you hold with your child and fine tune your knowledge and skills together. Use every library trip to ask your child what they wonder about and want to find out more about, and then show them how to look up information on their own. Also, introduce your child to the reference librarian—a new best friend if you’re serious about learning.

 

What if my child has no motivation for anything?

            Allow him to stop homeschooling completely for a while, but also eliminate all passive entertainment (movies, TV, computer games, twaddle reading, etc.), then see what she spends her time on by choice. This is a small price to pay in time lost compared to a lifetime of aimless wandering in an unfocused life.

 

What if my child is resisting selecting or being pigeon-holed into one calling area from which to build a growth plan?

            I have encountered this on numerous occasions. Those with a Perceiver personality preference love to keep all their options open and firmly resist feeling “boxed in” in any single area. I have also found that those with the personality preference of Judger are so efficient and time conscious, that they don’t want to waste any time going in the wrong direction or pursuing a dead end rabbit trail and may take extra time trying to discern the “one right path” they think they must take to get where they want to be. As a parent, you must encourage a Perceiver that they are learning an invaluable process that will apply to any future pursuit they may choose to explore. The Cultivate Your Calling philosophy is about learning how to learn and adapting to new situations and opportunities as God allows them into our lives with an emphasis on continual personal evaluation and adjustment. Develop in your child a heightened awareness of how God uses all that he has created in them and the experiences He allows into their lives to shape them for their ultimate purposes in His plan. For those parents dealing with a child who has a Judger personality preference, allow the child to take as much time as is necessary to research several options first before confidently starting a personal growth plan in one area of interest. This in itself is a learning process of self-evaluation and research skills that can be applied in future situations. The Judger must also realize that all learning that takes place, even if it doesn’t result in a straight path to an official degree or career path, has significant value, and often God teaches more through the “rabbit trails” than through our well laid plans.

 

Won’t I limit my child’s future if I focus in on one area of expertise?

            I wrestle daily to strike a balance between my academic “gap-o-phobia,” and tailoring our homeschool to meet the specific, targeted knowledge and skills needed to fulfill my kids’ life purposes. While it seems counterintuitive to focus on less than more, it has, in fact, proven to be a more effective strategy. In the Gallup Organization’s 30 year research project of individually interviewing over two million people, they discovered that “once a person has an area of competency, . . . [it] provides a framework for acquiring new knowledge and understanding. A lot of knowledge about one subject offers the integrating point for all other knowledge. Strengths develop best when sufficient time is devoted to a single subject or goal.” (Soar With Your Strengths by Clifton and Nelson, Delacorte Press, 1992).

 

Won’t a personalized program interfere with a strong liberal arts foundation?

            George Wythe, mentor of the highly educated Thomas Jefferson, developed a school where “each student had a personalized study program designed to fit his individual goals.” A true mentor is one who “helps each student identify where he or she is, and then says, ‘Okay, let’s develop a program for you. What do you want to become? What do you want to create? What do you want to learn?’ Once the mentor gets the answer from the student, he helps the student develop a personal plan to achieve it. You can’t train leaders on a conveyor belt; if you want to teach students how to think, their studies must be personalized.” (A Thomas Jefferson Education: Teaching a Generation of Leaders for the Twenty-First Century, Van DeMille, George Wythe College Press, 2000.)

 

What about basic skills in math and language arts?

            Obviously, it would do us no good to provide personalized training to the exclusion of basic skills. The Bible exhorts us not to be dependent on anyone, so we have a responsibility to teach both a broad base of foundational skills while also providing in-depth training in a few areas related to their bent.

 

What role should science and history education play?

            Again, we have a responsibility to teach our children the wonder and awe of God’s Creation and physical laws as well as learn from history so that we do not repeat the same mistakes. In I Cor. 10:11, it says, “These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the fulfillment of the ages has come.”  We must balance a broad base of general knowledge with in-depth knowledge in a few targeted personal areas for an optimal education for God’s Kingdom purposes.

 

How long should a personal growth plan take?

            For myself, I take as long as my learning wave takes to crest and crash. That may mean a week to six months and my interest may peak again in a year for a second dose of growth plans on the same topic. Go with your child’s “motivational flow,” because we all learn more when motivation runs high and when we have a direct application or output for new learning.

 

How many personal growth plans can my child do at once or expect to do in a year?

            Initially, start with just one as a supplement to whatever curriculum you have been doing. Based on your child’s needs and interests, try to dovetail whatever academic subjects naturally fit to efficiently streamline the Cultivate Your Calling process into your family’s homeschool. As your child gains motivation to learn and starts developing a greater curiosity in a particular area, you will begin to see spin-off interests and inquiry possibilities emerge. It is at this point that your student needs to begin documenting questions for future studies and possible do two or more simultaneous studies as your wisdom allows. You may try to start one new growth plan a month while leaving existing growth plans open-ended. However, if you child works better with deadlines, provide the structure needed for best results. Try to find the delicate balance between academic rigor and overload to keep any mental inertia from setting in.

 

How can I possibly add one more “subject” to our overcrowded day?

            I try never to add anything to my day, only to “merge” with something else I already do. Try to line up child’s high interest/calling area with the closest related school subject and plan a unit around it. Brainstorm related subject areas and see if you can “kill two birds with one stone.” For example, if your child is into photography, why not do photojournalism and merge spelling, language arts, creative writing, handwriting, computer skills, and even some history or science (only if relevant) as your child creates a portfolio project using a high interest area (photography) to motivate her to learn other subjects of less interest. Single subject workbooks could serve as a guide for parents, who could then adapt the general scope and sequence into the child’s passion area. Note: A curriculum’s scope and sequence tells what to teach and the most logical order in which to teach it.

 

How can I possibly do this with a houseful of children all with different interests and potential callings?

            Start with the oldest child first and allow the process to “trickle down” to the younger ones as they see their sibling’s enthusiasm and love of learning take over. Older siblings also seem to have a knack at training younger siblings (but your input and supervision are essential) and can be given the responsibility of co-planning growth plans with younger siblings with your approval and accountability.

 

How can I dovetail Cultivate Your Calling projects with another curriculum?

            Use your current curriculum as the unifying center and try to tie in an area of high interest. For example, we are studying the Renaissance period of history and my daughter has a high interest in creating friendship clubs and developing activities, rules, and hierarchies of jobs. By simply merging the two, she could do a project on “What would a girl’s club look like in the mid-1500’s in Italy?” or “What is the history of clubs and social organizations?” or “Write a story about a Renaissance girl’s best friends” or “Create a fictitious club of historical people during the Renaissance time (even if their life spans didn’t overlap or their paths never crossed).”  My son, however, disdains writing, but loves to draw. A more appropriate project for him might be to create a booklet of drawings depicting the chronology of Renaissance history and merely subtitle his creations. My youngest daughter adores all kinds of animals and has spent most of her childhood mimicking a different one each day. Her assignment is to write a story about a little girl and her pet rat during the Bubonic Plague of the 1400’s.

 

How can I cultivate my child’s calling on a budget?

            Cultivating your child’s calling doesn’t necessarily mean signing her up for every ballet class and music lesson, although these might become part of your overall plan if your child has such a bent. Ideally, you just want to develop your child’s curiosities and interests to such a degree that they are motivated to pursue self-study on a chosen topic. Once they learn basic research and resource finding skills, the sky is the limit as to what and how they will learn. Developing high motivation can overcome any barrier to learning, especially finances. Many have bartered or worked extra jobs to obtain special training simply because their high level of motivation compelled them to press through limiting circumstances.

 

Why should I interview others about their calling if my calling is unique?

            What you want to unearth through an interview is the person’s path of development they've undergone to prepare themselves for their current vocation, ministry or calling. Find out how they learned the necessary skills and knowledge, how they sought and gained the necessary experiences, who coached them, and what the most helpful resources they discovered were. See what you can apply to your unique situation from their process, not necessarily their content.